b4 i start, i would like to apologize to all my frens.. i'm sorry that i AM your friend and you all have to deal with my nonsense everyday..
i know you guys asked me to open up.. well, the thing is i can't.. i have been bottling all my feelings up since i was 10. and i'm not ready to open it yet.. i am in a state where i can't trust anyone including myself.. but believe me, i WANT to trust you all.. you guys are soo nice to me but i'm veerryyy sorry but i just can't..
i know it's hard to understand so to make it easier.. imagine a new bottle of water.. if u noticed i have NEVER open it by myself b4 *or gave up and buy air kotak instead* .. i always tried and then i gave up and ask someone else to help me open it.
this is almost the exact same thing.. i need someone else to help me open up because i'm not strong enough to do so...
7 years of bad experience and memories still remains in my deep deep soul.. i may have seem sumtimes too cheerful and happy.. but inside i'm just a girl who lost the meaning of joy and trying not to let people noticed it...
thank to you guys, the bottle starts to open a little.. and sooner or later it will open up..
To tya,
i'm sorry i made you feel dat way.. it does hurt me whenm you said that but trust me, it hurts me more if you didn't.. *but i do prefer you didn't do it in public like dat.. hehe*
about all those things you said.. i'm not good dealing wif people's emotion.. when you were nervous during public speaking, i was there to support you.. but as always i'm not good at calming people and i'm afraid that you might feel worse...
i didn't know that you felt that way.. my intention was good.. i may have said or made it seem that i used you but plleaase DO NOT think so..
and about the time i called you 'not a good person'... i'm sorry if i hurt you wif those words.. since you were joking, i was joking as well.. and you shud have known dat coz i know how nice and kind you are... please do not take this seriously..
i'm sorry that you have to put up wif me.. if i do anything that make you feel this way again. please tell me.. i will appreciate that..
lastly.. i'm sorry that you are my friend and i'll try not to be an a** anymore..
*i had to write it here coz words won't come out when i'm crying*
to Darshini..
Where R u when i needed you the most?????? *bawling*
i miss you soooo much... you are the ONLY one that cud make me feel better at the times like this... thanks for being my friend.... and tell oneknee to call me sumtimes and DARSH bskkk~~
deebah puuun.. pls come and visit me sumtimes... *muah*
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i know you guys asked me to open up.. well, the thing is i can't.. i have been bottling all my feelings up since i was 10. and i'm not ready to open it yet.. i am in a state where i can't trust anyone including myself.. but believe me, i WANT to trust you all.. you guys are soo nice to me but i'm veerryyy sorry but i just can't..
i know it's hard to understand so to make it easier.. imagine a new bottle of water.. if u noticed i have NEVER open it by myself b4 *or gave up and buy air kotak instead* .. i always tried and then i gave up and ask someone else to help me open it.
this is almost the exact same thing.. i need someone else to help me open up because i'm not strong enough to do so...
7 years of bad experience and memories still remains in my deep deep soul.. i may have seem sumtimes too cheerful and happy.. but inside i'm just a girl who lost the meaning of joy and trying not to let people noticed it...
thank to you guys, the bottle starts to open a little.. and sooner or later it will open up..
To tya,
i'm sorry i made you feel dat way.. it does hurt me whenm you said that but trust me, it hurts me more if you didn't.. *but i do prefer you didn't do it in public like dat.. hehe*
about all those things you said.. i'm not good dealing wif people's emotion.. when you were nervous during public speaking, i was there to support you.. but as always i'm not good at calming people and i'm afraid that you might feel worse...
i didn't know that you felt that way.. my intention was good.. i may have said or made it seem that i used you but plleaase DO NOT think so..
and about the time i called you 'not a good person'... i'm sorry if i hurt you wif those words.. since you were joking, i was joking as well.. and you shud have known dat coz i know how nice and kind you are... please do not take this seriously..
i'm sorry that you have to put up wif me.. if i do anything that make you feel this way again. please tell me.. i will appreciate that..
lastly.. i'm sorry that you are my friend and i'll try not to be an a** anymore..
*i had to write it here coz words won't come out when i'm crying*
to Darshini..
Where R u when i needed you the most?????? *bawling*
i miss you soooo much... you are the ONLY one that cud make me feel better at the times like this... thanks for being my friend.... and tell oneknee to call me sumtimes and DARSH bskkk~~
deebah puuun.. pls come and visit me sumtimes... *muah*
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